Archive for bush

The Onion staff may be psychic

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , on January 7, 2009 by dan

Check out this Onion article written in January of 2001

It’s eerie as shit.

A List Of People I Hate: AKA Assholes

Posted in Geekish, Geeky, Hate Speech, Humor, New Ideas, Owned with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on February 21, 2008 by chumpchange

Ever meet that guy you hate? The jerk-off who is always spouting something he heard on a TV show or the one who is endlessly saying something he heard someone else say at a party? Fuck Them. These assholes annoy me and I am going to make a list of them here right now for you to either Cheer or Jeer. Here goes.

  1. “REMIX” – This is the guy who yells remix whenever the CD skips. YOU SIR ARE A DOUCHE!! It was probably really, really clever and funny the first time it was said EVER, but here you are to ruin it and beat it into the worst joke ever, I’d rather have someone cum in my urethra than to hear this ever again.
  2. “I’m Rick James Bitch” or “Fuck Your Couch” this one has for the most part gone away and you never have to worry about it anymore but every once in a while there is that douche bag who thinks he is so hip that he can transcend the lameness of saying this and spin it into comedy gold only to find out that it overworked and in turn he becomes less cool and is uncovered as the unoriginal docuhe bag he actually is.
  3. “Drink It” – I think everyone knows who this refers to. That uber douche in beer pong who says “drink it” no matter what cup it goes into. No, I will not drink that empty cup. No, I will not drink the water cup that I washed the dog shit off in. NO. NO. NO.
  4. “Working Hard or Hardly Working” – Fuck you, the fact that you are asking me this implies that you aren’t working at all go masturbate to some bear porn asshole and let me decide if what I am doing is working or not, either way it is way more interesting than you.
  5. Popped Collar Guy – I don’t even know what to say, how fucking big are collars going to get? Is this fad over? Are you going to have a collar so big you look like dracula?
  6. Pink Shirt Guy – I have nothing against pink nor men who wear it. There was a time when men would wear pink shirts because they were a present or they were gay or they had no other shirts to wear but to go out and buy one because it is cool and hip and fad like? I don’t even know what to say this one perplexes me .
  7. “Douche Bags Who Think They are the Epitome of Cool” – Hey look at how hip we are, so hip we can be lame and it will automatically become cool because we are so cool. Dude listen, you’re stunning super cool rendition of I’m every woman by Whitney Houston is NOT AWESOME, the dance you made up to the Alphabet Song is NOT AWESOME, listening to Salt n Pepa and singing along is NOT AWESOME. Stop Being A Douchebag!

That is my list for now please add any comments at the bottom, and don’t be the smartass who writes all the things I hate as a comment.