Archive for February, 2009

Friday the 13th being released on Friday the 13th? Now that’s horrifying.

Posted in Uncategorized on February 10, 2009 by murfrr

I was actually running the franchise over in my mind the other night at work and a few things stood out.  Part IV being billed as the FINAL chapter is hilarious because they were just getting warmed up. Imagine if you told the writers of FINAL chapter that not only would this not be the last installment in the series but four more films down the road Jason would be slashing his way around Manhattan. And the series still wouldn’t end there!

I can honestly say I’m excited for the remake for two reasons, first I believe they are combining elements of the first three films. Which you have to do because Jason doesn’t appear in the first film and he doesn’t don the hockey mask until the third. Second, the Friday series was never really that good. If you’re going to remake, reboot, re envision, re- whatever the fuck you unimaginative pricks want to call it, then choose something that sucks. And let’s be honest, Friday has always been nothing more than a slasher franchise. I would be so bold as to say it’s no better than Child’s Play. I take that back, a giant, undead, machete wielding dude in Dickies, combat boots, and a hockey mask is far more badass than, well, a doll. But the first Child’s Play film was creepier and therefore better than the first Friday.

Michael Bay producing certainly tightens my sphincter a little but what the hell, maybe we can get Jason to chug a Coca Cola while running someone over in a Hummer. Or better yet, a gun fight on Kawasaki jet skis across Crystal Lake with Jason double fisting a pair of gold plated Uzis. That one got away from me a little. But while I was infinitely dissappointed with the Texas Chainsaw and Halloween remakes on account of both of those originals being far more atmospheric than gory, I feel Friday the 13th, which is nothing more than drunk teens getting slashed to pieces while copulating, is impossible to fuck up. We shall see.